I was going to write a 2009 wrap-up of my cycling exploits (or lack thereof). But I decided that after taking a reliable test I randomly found on the Internet that has determined my eternal fate, I am going to fill the cyber world with a multi-part diatribe of the last decade.
2000: Nothing starts a new decade like having a rummage sale. If I was a better shopper and did my research in the 1990's, I would not have bought half of the stuff I thought I needed. But this was a rummage sale that needed to occur whether I liked it or not. It really sucked to see the old crap go to another buyer (or multiple buyers based on who you talked to). So when a hired antiques appraiser tells you that what was in your possession was garbage all along, you do not feel bad that it is in someone else's garage. I still laugh today that I got the better part of the deal. I will be laughing harder in 2010.
2001: At sometime in all of our lives, you hit a patch of ice. But I was speeding on bald tires when I hit that ice. No. Not, never again.
2002-2004: Professional acceleration. Going very fast and not giving a shit about the speedometer. Get out of my way or road pizza. Even a motor with two wheels is procured for the need for speed. Kick. Ass.
2005: Ummm...was someone going to tell me about the gas gage? No problem. I will start walking to the nearest gas station and someone will pick me up along the way. HEY!!! Where is everybody?
2006: On that long walk to the gas station, finally a ride---in a LIMO! Treated like a rock star, with a free lunch. Hitting the gas pedal but always looking at the gas gage. And a GPS for the nearest gas station...
2007: Remodeling/Reconstruction is in order. The exterior is beyond repair, so the effort is concentrated on the interior. It is amazing what some gas, a knife, a saw and 4,5a-Epoxy-3-methoxy-17-methylmorphinan-6-one can do for oneself. But when the doc threatens (3R,5R)-7-[2-(4-fluorophenyl)-
3-phenyl-4-(phenylcarbamoyl)-5-(propan-2-yl)- 1H-pyrrol-1-yl]-3,5-dihydroxyheptanoic acid, it is time to remove the daily ingestion of 3-[(2S)-1-methylpyrrolidin-2-yl]pyridine.
2008: Sorry to steal this, Lance. But it is all about the bike.
2009: Loss. On too many fronts. My Nona left after a wonderful 97. Paul after 83. Pat after 44 hurt the most--on a bike. From loss comes enlightenment on how life should be lived. As my buddy Doug says: "Don't eat the stem of the mushroom and see a few colors, eat the WHOLE bag and see GOD!". Since Mother would have something to say if I ingested psilocybin, I will just say that 2009 sucked.
The Future: My antiques appraiser says that schadenfreude will provide early returns sometime in 2010. Remember, I'm going to Hell anyways....
AND it's all about the bike.
Happy Holidays.
